– by Steve Sakiyama –
Sometimes I wonder how I would fare in the Couch Potato Olympics – you know, where there are events like Couch Diving, Cushion Swimming and the Glazed Donut Throw. Although fit enough to chase down a pulled-pork food truck (or at least wave one down), I figured it was time to go to a real Fitness Centre, just to be inspired by those who live by the “I sweat therefore I am” philosophy.
Upon entering, the place was abuzz with fit-conscious folks expending calories while flailing about on shiny machines. Perfect. I quickly signed my name on a whiteboard to reserve time on a treadmill, thus avoiding a Centre etiquette faux pas. Imagine me gleefully jumping on a machine only to feel a light tap on my shoulder by a muscular Arnie look-alike, gently reminding me that it was his turn.
“Hasta la vista baby.”
The treadmill was of the Star Trek variety, where the control panel had several touch-screen buttons and even cable TV. Pushing various buttons initiated a launch sequence, and with a 3-2-1 countdown the belt started at a relaxed walking pace. Nice. After a while I upped the speed to the point where I imagined the voices of the uber-fit cheering me on.
“Run Forrest Run!”
Everything was fine until I tried to change the TV channel to the Food Network. As you can imagine, trying to push buttons while running on a belt moving at warp seven is my version of distracted driving. This momentary lapse of judgement caused a loss of stability and my limbs began an odd gyration. If left unchecked, these motions result in the classic treadmill flop, so I instinctively punched the big red STOP button and thus averted an embarrassing end. Beads of sweat were now on my brow, but it wasn’t from exercise.
Speaking of motion and balance, the atmosphere can also be in different states of stability. An “unstable” state means that vertical motions are enhanced. For example, on hot sunny afternoons enhanced vertical motions create puffy clouds that grow upwards, resulting in towering clouds of large vertical extent. Conversely, the atmosphere can be “stable” where vertical motions are suppressed. Stable conditions are common during calm clear nights, where the lack of vertical motion results in quiescent layers of cool air near the ground. Understanding the stability of the atmosphere helps meteorologists determine whether there is a potential for thunderstorms to form for example, or whether the skies will be clear.
So will the outlook for May and June be filled with a balance of unstable and stable conditions? The long-term models indicate a greater chance of above-normal temperatures, and no particular preference toward wetter or drier conditions – so expect something better than your average run-of-the-treadmill kind of transition from spring into summer.
I love Fitness Centres. As the full display of nature’s spectacular glory emerges during May, I’ll exercise in the biggest one around: our spectacular outdoors. Whether you want to treadmill through lush, forested trails or along a sandy beach – the whiteboard to reserve a time is completely clear.
~ Weatherwit.
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